Thanks to Elspeth the Totally Awesome for alerting me to this.
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So you're new to Booklikes, or you're not that adventurous, and you're stuck with one of the three basic themes.
You can upload wallpaper through customising your theme.
But hang on a minute! The wallpaper is repeating down the page! And it's half light and half dark and some of my grey text is getting lost in it! I CAN'T READ THE PAGE. It's all the wallpaper's fault!
Stress not, dear one! Elspeth's Ephemeral Musings alerted me on how to 'fix' your wallpaper so the text glides over it and the same picture stays:
{% if customize.colorTitle %}h1.header-title a { color: {{ customize.colorTitle }}; }{% endif %}
{% if customize.bg %}body { background: url("{{ customize.bg }}") 0 0 fixed; }{% endif %}
{{ customize.css }}
See where it says 'fixed', it's usually 'repeat'. Just change it to fixed and it will make your wallpaper stationary.
You have to do it individually for each page of your profile. Shelf, timeline etc
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Go forth my lovelies, and customise your wallpaper!
Go to settings>blog>theme:customize>edit HTML
...find this: